Today’s Musings: Better to go with someone than go it alone

by Paul Goodchild on March 21, 2012

Better to go with someone than go it alone

It’s funny how our priorities can change.  And how quickly at that.

I left Japan 2.5 years ago and back then I was driven by a desire to help – to give back somehow. I also wanted to hit the road and see what the world had to offer.

And that’s just what I got. I learned a shitload along the way and though the diversity and length of the travel wasn’t how I’d had imagined, it was a superb time well spent.

Fundamentally, my intentions haven’t changed in terms of doing meaningful work, but experience has taught me how effective I can be without a healthy bank account.

Now, after spending the past 12-18 months living fairly stationary in Europe, my priorities have definitely shifted dramatically.

Going it alone gets old

The biggest change in priorities is a growing desire to not do it alone – simply put, I’m tired of living a life by myself.

I’m spending the last day of a week-long holiday in Thailand sitting in a hotel on my own. The feeling of isolation that follows an intense week spent with some of the best friends in my life, that I barely see once in a year is… overwhelming, if I’m to be completely honest.

In times like these the need to have a partner, a close companion, is felt most strongly.

For quite a long time, after I split with a long-term girlfriend, “doing it alone” was preferable.  Sure, we’re all nearly always looking for a partner, and while I sometimes pursued this, I was generally happy enough to let it come to me.

Life is easier this way, in many respects. But I think it just isn’t as fun.

I’m a little surprised at myself for feeling so strongly about this. For so long I’ve maintained a strong notion of independence, and freedom from the drive of meeting that special someone and ultimately settling down.

Ultimately I guess that can only last for so long and it will eventually catch up on you.

Best not to fight it, eh…

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Jo March 21, 2012 at 16:03

Well said…I agree 🙂


Noch Noch March 26, 2012 at 09:43

hi paulie

i felt exactly the same way when i was in buenos aires walking along the streets and seeing people dance tango in the restaurants. i felt so lonely all of a sudden, and it felt very strange. i’ve always loved travelling on my own. but now someone, growing old, i just want to go with timmie or one or two close friends so i can share the fun with them

i hope u find someone who will be good to you soon



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