Life Coaching Sessions Two and Three

by Paul Goodchild on April 9, 2009

It’s been a few weeks since my second life coaching session and there is a lot to write about.  I actually had my 3rd session there on Tuesday so I figured rather than write 2 separate posts, I’d combine the two and see what I can relay from them.

Session 2: Career Anchors and Mind Maps

Session 2 involved another questionnaire, this time to determine my “career anchors” and a discussion around the results.  What came from this was a clearer understanding of what factors are most greatly influencing decisions about the environments I prefer to be working in.

It infers that if the 3 top anchors are not being fulfilled in our current careers, then that would explain in large part where much of the dissatisfaction creeps in.  It may not be, as we sometimes think, the company, our boss, our colleagues, or many other factors, but rather a glaring lack in our roles compared with what we are actually seeking from our work.

My top 4 anchors were, in order:

  1. Entrepreneur Creativity (EC)
  2. Service and Contribution (SV)
  3. Autonomy (AU)
  4. Lifestyle (LS)

And these more or less fit with what I already know.  For the longest time I’ve wanted to be the creator of my own enterprise.  I want to be a creator, my own boss, make the decisions that direct my future and that of the business.  At the same time, I’ve learned more recently that all this is for nothing if I’m not serving a higher purpose;  if I am not contributing in some significant manner to the society either locally or on a more global scale then I’m wasting my time.  There is nothing to be gained in the long term by working solely to fulfil your own limited and likely short-sighted goals if they impact only you.

Autonomy then comes into play, much like EC, above.  Being my own boss, creating and making decisions at a higher level that determine the outcome is a value I hold very dear.  I am open to suggestions, guidance and directives, but too much of that will stifle my ability to act and think independently enough to get the best job done that I can.  I have found that I habitually react negatively to encroachment upon my responsibilities, though I’m learning how to handle this better recently.  How?  By realising that attachment to objects and possessions empowers the ego.  Raising my awareness of this and releasing attachment is both a liberating and difficult process.

Following a discussion on these anchors, we then moved on to attempt to create a mind map.  This was not as successful as the coach would have hoped.  My style lends itself to prodding with questions that lead me to voice what’s in my head and I guess my nature is such that my thoughts don’t exit quite as freely as we’d have liked.  That said however, it was only the beginning and it brought my coach to understanding what more precisely I’d like to be doing with my life in terms of work.  This then lead to me leaving with an assignment to perform “informational interviews” with various parties in order to learn more about the various sectors I’m interested in.

Unfortunately, for the 2 weeks following this my motivation waned very significantly, and I didn’t get done as much as I’d initially hoped.  But this was in no way a failure, rather a pointer to something much deeper in my motivation that was holding me back from doing the things necessary…

Session 3: Discovering what I really want

Without doubt, this was the most significant discussion I had with the coach.  After thinking about why I wasn’t motivated to perform the tasks I had set for myself, I had found some answers.  It is basically that I’m not ready to set up my own business in this manner yet.  In my article on What would excite me, I referred to the book The Four Hour Work Week.  By far and away this was one of the more inspiring reads I’ve ever had and it really struck a chord with the way I want to be living my life.  I’d love to have my own enterprise, but I don’t believe we need to spend 12hrs+ a day to get there.  Provide a service that people want, and receive money back based on the value people hold for it.  I’m not looking to be a millionaire, but to be financially stable and have the money available to put towards the things I want with all the free time I have.  If you can grab a copy of that book from somewhere, I highly recommend you give it a look over.

So, what is it that I want then?  As I said, I want my own business, but not one that consumes my time (=life).  With the time that I’m not spending on work, I can do all the many things that I love to do or want to do.  Most significantly in my mind right now is travel.  This is what I want to do and the longer I postpone, the longer I must also postpone aspirations such as setting up my own enterprise.

I left the 3rd session with a view on how to approach the ideas I have and a timeline with which to proceed.  I’m going to start off with a 2 week holiday in Malaysia or the Philippines as a an aid to clear my mind and take a break from the daily grind.  Hopefully by the end of that, while I may not have the answers to all the questions, I will be in a better position to face them.

Any comments or feedback on this article, or other articles in the Life Coaching series?  I’d love to hear what you think of this post. Please feel free to write me a message using the space below.  Thank you for visiting!

{ 0 comments… add one now }

Leave a Comment

{ 1 trackback }

← Previous Article:

→ Next Article: